passing sights

Crisis ~ 危机

Crisis is an essential component of growing-up. Only with the occurrence of crisis can one learn the ropes of crisis management. As long as I am willing, my future is not a dream.
危机是让人成长的必需品。只有危机的出现才能让人学怎麼危机处理。只要我愿意，我的未来，绝对不是梦。

转载：以本性，迎向爱情

最近迷上看吴淡如的《那些EMBA教我的东西》。本身不看小说，之前在书局里看到她的小说，兴趣缺缺。不是因为吴女士写得不好，而是我肤浅，真的不喜欢那类小说，写得再好，我也不会欣赏。

以下的文章，让我这自扰的庸人终于明白了一件生活中的事情。一直不明白某位要强好胜的女性会如此。终于懂了。要强好胜与感情成熟度是不能画上等号的。

以本性，迎向爱情(2009-06-11 21:43:11)
她是一位高中女老师，一路平顺：从小成绩优异，也是个乖乖女，国立大学毕业，三十年的生命里，没有谈过恋爱。

初恋好像出水痘，越早发作越安全，会累积一些经验，好歹有一点抗体。

她一点抗体也没有的。

女老师的爸爸，非常疼爱她，为了她上班方便，在她任职的学校附近，为她买了一间房子。

就这样，她和为她装潢房子的同龄设计师谈恋爱了。他对她很好、很温柔。

可是他结婚了。

跟所有已婚男子向未婚女子示好的理由一样：他说，他和妻子感情不好。

几乎跟所有爱上已婚男子的未婚女子一样，时间一久，她也要求他给她一个承诺；她想的很简单：为什么感情不好，却不离婚呢？

他的回答还真的出人意外，他说妻子目前怀孕，等她坐完月子，他就会离婚。

她相信了。完全是被爱冲昏头。

第三者如果聪明一点的话，就会明白，自己永远处在一种矛盾中：一个男人，可以对他的枕边人那么狠，那么，她将来的幸福也不会有什么保障；但是，如果他对现在的枕边人不够狠，那么她要的承诺，永远是空头支票。

这个男人看出她一爱上就离不开的弱点，期待她的投资。他想买房子、成立公司，都找她，还要她挂名为负责人。女人以为，这样就是重视她，她有保障了。

只要需要周转，他都找她，最可怕的还是用她的名义向好几家地下钱庄借钱。

然后，他的支票全跳了票，他消失了。

所有与他有关的负债，全找上了公司的负责人──就是她。

讨债人马不断骚扰她和她的家人。她才承认人财两失的事实，报了案。

女老师说：我以为他要跟我结婚，对我又那么好，他讲的什么我都信，怎知道会这样？

她的父亲也很难过，女儿从小乖巧听话，才会这么相信人。出这么大的事情，是他想也想不到的。

在很多含有欺骗特质的爱情实例里，不少乖女孩都有飞蛾扑火的特质，她们未经世事，所以相信所有甜蜜承诺。有的乖女孩，年纪也不小了，事业上也可能很精明，但在爱情里头，也都还是一本诚信，一往情深的相信她的情人。

梦碎了还存一丝希望，希望他不是故意骗她。

飞蛾扑火，不是笨，是因为她太善良天真，总是以她最真实的本性，迎向爱情。

Bottleneck ~ 瓶颈

Please do not ask why I did not update my blog.

For I could not provide any reason either.

It is not due to a lack of thoughts.

It is not because I simply do not want to write.

But when I sit in front of the computer, all the nice lines and words just simply slipped away like fine quicksand. That I could not hold them down to put them here.

An apology to the future me.

For one fine day, if I ever have the impulse to read what I had written in the past, I would find a large chunk of myself gone.

不要问我为什么那么就都没更新博客。

因为我也说不出一个理由来。

不是没有想法。

不是不想写。

只是坐在电脑前面，之前想的文章，全都有如流沙，让我无法把它们捉了关到此处。

对未来的自己道歉。

因为未来如果突发奇想想要再回味自己的拙作就会惊觉：为什么会有这么一长的一段时间是空白、毫无回忆的？！

Female bankruptcies surge due to lure of celebrity lifestyle

Wed, Jun 24, 2009
The New Paper
Female bankruptcies surge due to lure of celebrity lifestyle

A STUDY in Britain has found that young women are ‘lured into bankruptcy by celebrity lifestyle’.

Their quest to have that slinky Victoria Beckham look or a flirty Paris Hilton tog has caused a surge in female bankruptcies, said The Daily Telegraph.

New research from accountancy firm Wilkins Kennedy reveals that 55 per cent of bankrupts under the age of 24 were women last year, reported The Independent.

This was just 48 per cent five years ago.

In total, 1,560 women under 24 were declared bankrupt compared to 1,250 men in the same age group.

Many young women have become trapped in debt because they buy designer clothes and accessories to display the ‘trappings of success’, the study said.

Mr Anthony Cork of Wilkins Kennedy, told the Daily Mail: ‘Five years ago it tended to be young men who got out of their financial depth, but now it is far more likely to be young women who spend irresponsibly.

‘That gap between the genders seems to be growing. Over the last decade, the pressure on young women to follow the lavish lifestyle of female celebrities has grown immensely.

‘In all seriousness we are told that Paris Hilton and Victoria Beckham are role models to be followed. The growing availability of credit has meant that for the status-conscious, who want to exhibit the trappings of success, designer clothes and jewellery seem misleadingly achievable.’

The researchers said young men did not appear to feel the social pressure to ’spend conspicuously’ or set up on their own to the same extent that women do.

Gender pay gap

As a result, they are able to build up a bigger cushion of savings. The extra pressures on women are exacerbated by the gender pay gap, although this is relatively small among under-24s.

Last year, around 67,500 people in all age groups went personally bankrupt in England and Wales, an increase of 89 per cent over the past five years.

Overall, those over the age of 45 are the most likely to go bankrupt, as falling house prices and rising unemployment reduces their ability to manage debt.

This article was first published in The New Paper

好歌分享：《我可以忍受》 ——徐洁儿

读了歌词，觉得这女人好傻。不过，爱着男人的女人总是傻的。在旁边看着的女人总是理智的。

歌曲：我可以忍受
歌手：徐婕儿 专辑：女人不坏

我可以忍受你不够爱我
我可以忍受你有别的梦
就算是编谎话哄我
至少你还在乎我的感受
我可以忍受眼神的空洞
我可以忍受你时间不够用
却不能忍受作了那么多
是她拥有我该得到的温柔

爱着你
是我改不了也不愿改的习惯
要放开哪有那么简单
了解你
是我说不出也不承认的悲哀
包容你
是我体谅的爱别当作应该

我可以忍受你不够爱我
我可以忍受你有别的梦
就算是编谎话哄我
至少你还在乎我的感受
我可以忍受眼神的空洞
我可以忍受你时间不够用
却不能忍受作了那么多
是她拥有我该得到的温柔

爱着你
是我改不了也不愿改的习惯
要放开哪有那么简单
了解你
是我说不出也不承认的悲哀
包容你
是我体谅的爱别当作应该

我可以忍受你不够爱我
我可以忍受你有别的梦
就算是编谎话哄我
至少你还在乎我的感受
我可以忍受眼神的空洞
我可以忍受你时间不够用
却不能忍受作了那么多
是她拥有我该得到的温柔

no.no.no
不要说对不起
原来你要的不是我
不要说谢谢你
什么你永远在我心中
can u tell me why
这样的我你也曾爱过
不是吗

我可以忍受你不够爱我
我可以忍受你有别的梦
就算是编谎话哄我
至少你还在乎我的感受
我可以忍受眼神的空洞
我可以忍受你时间不够用
却不能忍受作了那么多
是她拥有我该得到的温柔
是她拥有我没看过的笑容